Boozie's Ruse

I can lift you up

I can drop you down

We can take a trip to Drunken Town

You can start off fast

Or take it slow

No one to harsh the mellow

You’ll want one

Then you’ll need four

You’ll be downing more than you know

I come cheap

Or can cost you a lot

But can you do the math as you take a draught?

I can be pleasantly sweet

Or oh so bitter!

(Whatever works to rid your jitters)

When you want to celebrate

And click glasses to raise a toast 

I’m the one you’ll want the most

If you’ve had a bad day

And you’re feeling grey and gloomy

I promise I’ll keep you company

When your self-esteem needs a boost

Or you need loosening up

Keep me close and you won’t want to shut up!

When your legs turn jelly

And you start blubbering to her

Worry not! I’m Dr.Cupid’s prescribed elixir

Psychiatrists write me off

As disease inducing

But I bet you can’t keep away from this yummy poison

Some of my mates have gone astray

To join some silly club called the AA

But will they ever live to tell their tale another day?

I’m as holy as can ever be

I earned an invite to the first ever party

When the host broke bread with his disciples and me

Is your vision blurring

Or your stomach churning?

Keep at it and you’ll end up learning

So let me out and let me pour

As you hold me up and hold me close

And I’ll be yours till forever and ever more