They pull my cheeks
And pinch my nose
They make funny faces
And tickle my toes
They baby talk
When they can speak!
I want to hide my face
When walked down the street
'Goo goo', 'Ga Ga' is all I know
Still I'm expected to put on a show
Where is your nose? And where are your ears?
I can't take this silliness anymore
I think up of ridiculously simple ways to repel
I fart, burp, throw up and poop
I give my best to stink up the joint
This should put an end to all the 'coochie coo'
Some days are bad
While some are worse
Itchiness, anger, sleep deprivation
Makes me want to let loose
I know I'm adorable
That's stating the obvious
Still doesn't make it okay
To create a mighty stupid fuss
I know it's my birthday
And I will turn one
But stuffing me in velvet and lace
Is not my idea of fun
It's bad enough you committed a fashion faux passé
Now I'm passed from hand to hand
Trust me when I tell you
Babyhood is not all that grand!
I would be a billionaire if I was paid
Every time someone said
'Show me where your feet are
And where is your head'
What do you know?
It's a lot of work to look this darn cute
I put up with oily massages and hot baths
And rigorous powdering and fluffing up too
But I'll let you in on a secret
This one is no lie
Though I hate being a baby
I love being the apple of your eye!
